All the way down the rabbit hole into the deepest, darkest parts of shame.
The side of your shadow that you hide from others.
The darkness that creeps up on you in the middle of the night, leaving you in a panic, gasping for air.
The shame that you push down, time and time again. Only to be suffocated by it when anyone tries to get to close to you.
The shame that tell you that you are worthless and unloveable.
This is the dark side of you that manipulated you into thinking you needed it to survive.
You hide shame, your intimate friend, behind a smile and charm.
Shame whispers in your ear and tells you it will keep you safe as it wraps your hands around your throat.
You gasp for air and cry as you kiss shame for the last time.
You have made a decision to face the darkness, to dive in head first into the rabbit hole to explore the darkest parts of your soul.
You will heal the toxic energy you have absorbed from others.
You will heal the sores where energy vampires have sucked you dry.
You will hold the part of you that has been broken in a compassionate place.
The compassion for yourself opens up the space around your heart so that you can finally breathe.
Shame releases its icy fingers from your chest, and disappears for the time being.
The darkness will return the next time you abuse yourself. You have been abused by others for so long that you don’t know how to be loved.
Compassion whispers in your ear, “I love you unconditionally.”
Your stomach clenches in fear. You can’t trust it. You’re exhausted from shame so you take a leap of faith into the white light of compassion.
You realize shame is the liar. Shame is fear.
You let go of judgement towards yourself and others.
The night has passed, and you can finally see the sun.