Rob, like many men, found himself in a situation he couldn’t quite understand. He woke up each morning with a sense of dread, a feeling of heaviness and emptiness that he couldn’t quite place. He was taught that a man does not complain; he does what needs to be done for himself and his family. He knew he could not give up and had to soldier on. However, the challenges in his life seemed to weigh him down, and he struggled to make sense of his feelings.
Rob worked overtime to support his family, and the long hours led to insomnia. With the insomnia came the anxiety and the depression. However, he believed that real men do not have mental health issues. Additionally, if they do have mental health issues, they must be weak. Rob’s wife noticed he was losing weight and encouraged him to get professional help. Though his wife meant well, Rob felt she was looking down on him. His wife’s concerns made him feel inadequate. Rob began to lash out and become short with his wife, kids, and colleagues. Eventually, his wife threatened to leave him if he didn’t speak to someone.
Steve had been having nightmares ever since he had been discharged from the military. He drank alcohol to cope with the flashbacks and suicidal thoughts he was having. His friends encouraged him to get help. However, Steve felt that getting help would break the code of silence he had made with the military. He had seen some things that he wished he could forget. On one torturous night, Steve drank too much and took some pills. He was hoping to fall into a deep sleep where he could wake up without the mental anguish. However, he woke up in the emergency room due to an overdose.
Alan hated the way he looked. Every time he looked in the mirror, he felt small. He wanted to be bigger and stronger. Though he worked out six times a week and ensured he ate enough protein, he felt weak. Even though people at the gym and work told him how fit he looked, his protein-high diet eventually led to some medical issues. The doctor said to him that he thought Alan had some body dysmorphia, which led to an eating disorder. Alan was shocked; he thought only women developed eating disorders. He was too embarrassed to reach out for help.
According to the Centers for Disease Control, men make up fifty percent of the population but nearly eighty percent of suicides. Men are four times more likely to take their own life than women. Indeed, depression, alcohol-related causes, drug misuse, and suicide are leading causes of death among men. Men often struggle to seek help due to various stigmas and masculine norms. Boys are usually socialized as aggressive, rough, and dominant. This means that they are encouraged not to show emotions or cry. These behaviors and stigmas can lead to health risks, relationship issues, interpersonal violence, substance abuse, and mood disorders.
Here are some other alarming statistics
According to the World Health Organization, 2.6 million deaths last year were attributed to alcohol; 2 million of those deaths were men.
Men are more than twice as likely to die from a drug overdose than women
Men account for eighty percent of suicide deaths
One in three people with an eating disorder is male
Despite the alarming statistics, it’s important to remember that help is available and can make a significant difference in a man’s life. Seeking professional help can be the turning point from maladaptive coping mechanisms to a healthier life. Therapy is a powerful tool for managing stress, improving relationships, boosting self-worth, and feeling seen and heard. It also equips men with the skills to understand and manage their needs, feelings, conflict, and communication styles.